Long time, no write

I suppose I have some explaining to do.

My prolonged layoff from these pages has a perfectly valid reason. Really. Life has just been crazy and hectic and busy and difficult beyond belief lately.

Things were already less than golden about three weeks ago. Presumably I've given some indication of that in this space (I don't remember and don't feel like checking to see what I last wrote), but for miscellaneous reasons things could've been quite a bit better.

Then, Dick died. He was the best teacher I've ever had, and also the only educator I've really related to on a more personal level. Dick was "Mr. Ethics" -- the authority on media and journalism ethics and integrity, at least in this country, and around the world, so far as I could tell.

But Dick was also down to earth and accessible in ways other teachers aren't. I've never so much as had a cup of coffee, let alone lunch or dinner with another teacher or professor. But meeting for dinner or lunch was something I did with Dick at least once, sometimes twice a quarter. And he always bought. No matter how often I or my other friends (namely Joe and Billy) insisted, he wouldn't let us treat him, just once, or even pay our own way. The last time we had lunch together, he wouldn't let me treat him, even though I really wanted to do so, saying something about how he had plenty of money and we were all starving college students or struggling to make it on our own, and somehow, it just didn't seem right to him to let us pay when he could afford to do so without batting an eye. That's just the kind of guy he was.

Another thing that differentiated Dick from all other teachers was the way he sincerely valued students' opinions on everything. When we had lunch that last time, he grilled me to know where I got my news, what Web sites I read regularly to stay informed. And he was perpetually asking my opinions about current issues in the media or politics, often he'd scribble notes for his own reference. He kept his pulse on things better than anyone. And, I'll definitely miss shooting the bull or sharing my two cents with him.

The news about Dick came while my cousin Kyle was visiting from California, making good on his longstanding promise to visit me a college by showing up for the week before my graduation. Hosting Kyle was fun; it was probably the best time for him to visit since I didn't have class or work and wanted to see and do a lot of stuff in Chicago myself. But, it contributed to the chaos in my life.

It was fun, though. We went to a beer garden on Navy Pier that kicked off Senior Week (the beer garden sucked, but at least we got transportation to and from and some free food). We also went to a White Sox game, then hit the Adler Planetarium, the Sears Tower and Pizzeria Due, all fine Chicago landmarks (and other that Due, places I'd never been myself, though the service at the pizzeria sucked).

Compounding this madness, my 12-year-old cousin Andrew had surgery right before Senior Week to correct the curvature of his spine. His back surgery went well, but he experienced complications later that night, and only got worse. I flew down to Indianapolis one morning to visit him, and he didn't look good. He had all kinds of tubes and machines connected to him and was badly puffed up, apparently because his kidneys had stopped working and he was on dialysis. At that point he was showing signs of improvement, however, so everyone was optimistic that he'd make a full, albeit long and slow recovery.

I drove back up to E-town the next morning with my parents to begin partaking in all the graduation stuff. There was Honors Day and the history department's reception, where I learned I didn't win the department thesis prize, but evidently came in second. It was some consolation, though I could certainly have used the $400 cash prize that came with it. Friday was commencement and Saturday was convocation, where I finally got that piece of paper I'd been working toward the past four years, or so I thought. Turns out, because I had several grades not released till days before graduation, they hadn't expected me to finish with honors so high as I had: magna cum laude, thank you very much. So, I have a diploma and await a new one with full honors in the mail.

The day after convocation, I rode back to Erie, Penn., with Colleen and her parents for a week of vacation and fun. It was a long drive, but not too bad, considering that the van's electrical system and air conditioning were not working at full capacity. There was a nice reward at the end of the journey, though, namely some delicious deep-fried turkey and the experience of being put under the microscope by innumerable aunts, uncles, cousins, parents, grandparents, etc. But, Colleen's family all seem very nice, and I at least think I avoided embarrassing myself or somehow earning their eternal enmity, both of which are accomplishments in and of themselves.

Monday was nice and laid back. We slept in late (a hallmark of a truly nice, relaxing vacation), ate lunch at Arby's drove to a beach on Presque Isle, saw some of the landmarks of Colleen's life in Erie, then headed home to relax for a couple of hours. That night, her grandparents took us to dinner at a nice seafood restaurant, Smugglers Wharf, where I had some delicious beer-battered perch and we had a nice meal and conversation. We walked around the pier, went up to the observation deck of the Bicentennial Tower (or whatever it's called; I'm not sure I'm not just making that name up).

Tuesday was tremendous fun, as Colleen and I drove to Cleveland to see an Indians game, or more accurately, so I could see Jacobs Field. It truly is a beautiful ballpark, and the most fan-friendly sports venue I've ever seen. We also had some excellent seats, in the lower boxes along the left-field line, where we almost got killed twice by foul balls, but also enjoyed a great perspective to watch the game.

I can't remember what we did Wednesday or Thursday, other than that we got some pepperoni balls (an Erie specialty) and watched some quality TV and movies. I also took advantage of ample access to the family Xbox and FIFA World Cup 2002, which was quite enjoyable.

Friday night we went to Pittsburgh with Colleen's youngest brother, Zach, to see a Pirates game (or, again, really so I could see PNC Park). We got to the stadium a couple of minutes late, and since there was a fireworks spectacular scheduled for after the game, it was actually sold out, though we managed to get three standing room tickets. It wasn't the best way to appreciate the park, but it was still a nifty place. There's a gorgeous view of downtown Pittsburgh and the bridges over the river right behind the stadium, which was just fabulous. And, the fireworks lived up to their billing. I think that's an excellent way to see a ballpark for the first time, but having it illuminated by fireworks. And we got to see a pierogyi race, which I believe trumps the sausage race in Milwaukee, if only because the six-foot-tall parrot mascot of the Pirates leapt from the stands to tackle three of the four racing pierogyies, leaving the fourth in the clear for a victory.

Saturday we headed to Niagara Falls, which marked the first time I'd been to the state of New York. The falls are pretty impressive, and I definitely enjoyed the voyage on the Maid of the Mist, a boat that takes we tourist folk up close to the bottom of the falls, and gets them nicely soaked, despite the spiffy trash bags that pass for ponchos they provide. There were some nice rainbows, and not so nice soakings. But, it definitely cooled us off on a hot day.

After that, we walked across the Rainbow Bridge to Niagara Falls, Canada, where we ate dinner at the Rainforest Cafe and visited the RCMP (that's the Mounties, for those of you unfamiliar with the north-of-the-border parlance) and Hershey stores there. Then we returned to the U.S. side (sadly) and watched the falls at night, when they're illuminated in a rainbow of colors and truly awesome.

Sunday was kind of a nice, lazy day. We hung around the house most of the day, then Colleen and I went back out on Presque Isle and got some ice cream before retiring for the evening.

Monday was a sad, awful day. It began with having to go to Cleveland to leave Colleen for an indefinite time. It may well be two and a half months before we get to see each other again; hopefully not so long, but we can't be sure. And it just got sadder and worse from there.

Instead of going from Midway to O'Hare in Chicago so I could fly home to Los Angeles, as originally planned, I instead had to go to the bus station to get to Indiana because Andrew was fading fast. He had gotten worse the previous week, and by the weekend it became apparent that he wasn't going to make it. I made it to the hospital with my aunt, uncle and cousin a couple of hours after I got in, we said goodbye to Andrew, and I was in the room with my mom, uncle and his mother when Andrew finally died. It's been really sad and difficult these past few days. I just can't convey how difficult it is to have someone close like a cousin die at such a young age. 12 years old. I wouldn't even want to try to convey to someone else how painful this is. The visitation, funeral and burial are all tomorrow. I'm serving as a pallbearer, and it'll be difficult for everyone in our family. I don't know what else to say about it, other than to say that it sucks and this has been the most difficult, trying time of my life.