Flammable or inflammable?

Just caught an ESPN teaser for a story on the death of Hall of Fame football coach Bill Walsh:

A legendary coach takes his place among the immortals ...

Now, I might be nitpicking, but "immortal" means, roughly, someone who doesn't and can't die. So saying Bill Walsh became immortal because he just died ... well, that's just stupid.

If this continues, funding will become easier

Sometimes I wonder why my research and interest in communism in Eastern Europe is relevant.

And sometimes, the DoD solves the dilemma for me.

Soviet-style 'torture' becomes 'interrogation'

If a Stanley Cup Finals is played in Orange County, does anybody care?

Evidently not, according to TSN's intrepid man-on-the-beach reporting.

There was plenty of volleyball going on at the beach Monday but little sign of a hockey fan. Some say they are fans but it's wise not to scratch too deeply below the surface.

''Yes I am. I live right near where they train for the Ducks,'' said Anaheim's Sheryl Lobbig, who was taking a break from suntanning. ''I like how they get in fights. It's very aggressive. I like the aggressiveness.''

But can she name the team facing the Ducks in the final?

''No, not now I can't,'' she said. ''I'm not up on that right now. The Kings?''

Lobbig turned to her two friends.

''Who is the team from Canada?'' she asked.

The responses were ''Minnesota'' and ''the Royals''.

Nice. I especially like how someone evidently located Minnesota in Canada. Not that I'm surprised. I recall the fourth-grade classmate who said "Canada is under Texas," so you can see OC-educated folks are routinely stumped by Canadian geography.

Someone knows where the bodies are

Earlier today someone broke into the grave of János Kádár, the longtime Communist leader in Hungary (though not the last, as Reuters is erroneously reporting), and stole his remains and an urn containing those of his wife.

Needless to say, someone in Budapest has a couple of skeletons in the closet.

What a country, redux

The only thing more brilliant than Chevy blending antiwar and pro-war imagery without any sense of the obvious irony, is their decision to use a similar ad campaign north of the border.

Watch the CBC, and sooner or later you'll encounter Chevy ads with the same Mellancamp ditty about how "This is our country," but with images of Canadian natural beauty, pond hockey, and other quintessential bits of Canadiana.

So, to recap, "This is our country (America, or possibly Canada, or maybe both)!"

However, they were packing Swiss army knives

Scandal!

It'd be a lot more fun to see Liechtenstein step it up and respond with some sabre rattling of its own. Maybe they can't start campaigning for autonomy for the Letzenburgers in Switzerland.

ZURICH, Switzerland (AP) -- What began as a routine training exercise almost ended in an embarrassing diplomatic incident after a company of Swiss soldiers got lost at night and marched into neighboring Liechtenstein.

According to Swiss daily Blick, the 170 infantry soldiers wandered 2 kilometers (1.2 miles) across an unmarked border into the tiny principality early Thursday before realizing their mistake and turning back.

A spokesman for the Swiss army confirmed the story but said that there were unlikely to be any serious repercussions for the mistaken invasion.

''We've spoken to the authorities in Liechtenstein and it's not a problem,'' Daniel Reist told The Associated Press.

Officials in Liechtenstein also played down the incident.

Interior ministry spokesman Markus Amman said nobody in Liechtenstein had even noticed the soldiers, who were carrying assault rifles but no ammunition. ''It's not like they stormed over here with attack helicopters or something,'' he said.

Liechtenstein, which has about 34,000 inhabitants and is slightly smaller than Washington DC, doesn't have an army.

So, if I claim Swiss ancestry, and were to develop somehow a modicum of Swiss pride, would I now have to start boycotting all those Liechtenstein goods I use. Like, uh, postage stamps.

Scenes from a mall

Much as I hate dealing with the hassles of big crowds and overpriced crap, I found it impossible to avoid going to the mall this weekend to do holiday shopping. But going to the mall during holiday season has its advantages, namely that stores have enough customers that I don't have to deal with bored or pushy clerks asking if I need help whenever I walk in a store. "No, thanks. I'd much rather wander around meekly and avoid human contact."

Whilst at the mall, I got the bright (and by "bright" I mean "laughably ill-conceived") idea to go into the requisite bookstore, thinking I might be able to pick up paperback copies of Hobbes' Leviathan and Machiavelli's The Prince. Major works of the European canon, sure to be on the shelves of any bookstore worth it's salt. Ahem.

Needless to say, there was no section labeled "political philosophy," or "philosophy," or anything else that would've seemed remotely apt. (Self-help, perhaps?) Rather than ask for help and earn a lot of blank stares, I retreated, my faith in humanity shaken yet again.

On the bright(?) side, I happened to notice the bookstore now has a larger section devoted to "military history" than to "U.S. history." Which strikes me as matter of truth in advertising, since I don't think the selection of titles has changed appreciably.